Why Cant I Remember My Childhood And Teenage Years latest 2023

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4 Barriers Mothers Face When Raising Their Daughters

Before I became a mother, I remember hearing the statement several times: “Wait until you have your own daughter, you’ll see what it’s like.” There were a lot of preconceived notions people had about raising a daughter so even before I started the belief had already been programmed into me that if I had a daughter I was going to have a lot of challenges. I have often heard that it is much easier to raise boys than girls.

Do you see where I’m coming from?

Our daughters barely stand a chance because we have already been conditioned to believe that they are going to be difficult. As we carry this energy with us through the birth of our daughters and then into their childhood and adolescence, we are getting exactly what we thought we were going to get. Our thoughts and beliefs create our reality, so unless you change that belief along the way, you will undoubtedly encounter the challenges you thought you would encounter.

As a mother myself and having worked with other mothers struggling with their daughters, I have found 4 roadblocks when it comes to raising your daughter.

Barrier 1 – Communication Failure – it’s human nature to want the best for our daughters and in doing so we sometimes forget that she has her own opinions that she needs to voice. We get so caught up in what we think is right and wrong and rather than just listening to what she has to say, we tend to judge based on our own opinions and beliefs. Remember that part of communication is listening. You might be surprised at what you can learn from her if you’re just open to listening.

Barrier 2 – Fear of letting go – We want to prevent our daughters from making the same mistakes as us rather than believing they will make the right choices, we hold them back. The things that we see as mistakes in our lives are what encouraged us to get to where we are now. There are no errors. Everything happens for a reason. Where you are is exactly where you are meant to be right now. It’s important to give your daughter that same opportunity to learn and grow, and to accept her for who she is, not who you think she should be.

Barrier 3 – Need for control – This can become a real power struggle between mothers and daughters. It is necessary to stay in control by making decisions for her based on what you think is good or bad, right or wrong. Although mothers and daughters generally look a lot alike, they still perceive things differently. Rather than telling her what you think is right or wrong, good or bad, why not ask her what she thinks about it. By asking questions and letting your daughter give you the answers, you lose control. You are now encouraging her to see things from a different angle.

Barrier 4 – Believing we have all the answers – We often get caught up in our own belief, “I know what’s right for my daughter.” Although mother-daughter relationships are paramount and the first true connection our daughters experience, we cannot know what is good for them all the time, any more than our mother can always know what is good for us. What is good for us is not necessarily good for them. This is just our point of view.

By overcoming these 4 barriers, you will be well on your way to having a more open and trusting relationship with your daughter.

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